I’m frustrated. I’m annoyed. I’m hungry. I’m starving. I’m losing it. Slowly. I’m lost. I’m confused. I’m sure. I’m aware. I’m frazzled. I’m jaded. I am a woman. Who needs to vent.
Am I supposed to have this wife thing down after two years of marriage? If so, I’m failing.
I am the wife of an entrepreneur, and I swear, I never knew how hard it would be for me.
I wasn’t raised to not have my own goals. My life is not anyone else’s, and nobody else’s life is mine. So how am I supposed to be content with putting my goals on hold for the achievement of someone else’s?
I felt myself losing my mind months ago, but hid it behind glasses of red wine and a long trip to Southeast Asia.
In which, I have not been the same since returning from Asia. I haven’t discovered why things feel weird. They just do. I should try to figure out why.
I don’t expect my husband to fulfill every need that I have as a human. However, shouldn’t I be able to talk to him and vent to him about anything? Or no?
I have four friends. Literally, four friends.
If I wasn’t married, I would be in the Peace Corps or a digital nomad. Away from Baltimore. Because honestly, I’m sick of this hellhole.
I question if I’m ready to become a mother. I feel like I’m still a child. I like my sleep. Some days, I don’t put on clothes. My socks never match. I like spending my money however I wish, and I like being able to argue at the top of my lungs if I want.
I fall in love with so many people, so many souls. It’s a struggle to make sure my husband knows that the love I have for him ain’t like any other love I give to others.
I seem to give the right advice to everyone else except myself. Why can’t I listen to myself?
All of my issues would be absolved if I could figure out how to focus… How the fuck do I focus, ya’ll?